Wednesday, 28 November 2012

Longing and other assorted love songs...

Hey everybody!

We're gonna have some fun, we're having a magic party and I thought you might like to come!

But seriously, welcome to another edition of my fantastic blog!

And by fantastic, I mean a little mundane!

Now, if you read my last post I mentioned a mystery lady, who again for reasons beyond my control I can't name, but I'll go into the specifics of what's gone down.

I've known her for a couple of years now, she's just been an acquaintence for a while, but this year we've really gotten to know each other well, and we trust each other enough now that she's told me alot of very personal things, I've been there for her, and she's been there for me. More importantly an issue that's arisen with women I've tried to get close to is my epilepsy and the problems it causes, it intimidates alot of people and I can understand why, it still doesn't make it easier when it drives people away, but this girl understands, and she understands my unpredictable/volatile personality, because she is exactly the same, and it is very nice to have that common ground with someone. She's had as hard a time in life as I have, and that's what really kicked it off between us.

And that's the thing, even though I'm big, intimidating, and most notably into my hard rock music, some might say that someone as small, gobby and into modern pop as she is may not even have the slightest thing in common, but we do, and that is what I love about her.

There's that word again, love, it's a strong word and I'm not using it lightly, it is a love for her that I have, and I mean that, but the thing is I don't have it in me to tell her about it, let me tell you why...

I've described how good a friendship we have, and how nice a girl she is but the kicker is, is that she has alot on her plate as it is, and I imagine the last thing she would need is someone like me filling up what little spare time she has, which is logical, but it still doesn't stop it hurting me every time I see her.

I plan out ways I might tell her, but everytime I see her I just crumble, and any of you that know me well enough will know, that I don't crumble at all.

Now I've felt this way for months, since about May, infact, and I still haven't had the guts to tell her how I feel about her, no matter what people say or advise, it takes alot.

So yeah, I feel I had to get it out there

Thanks for reading

Monday, 19 November 2012

The Dream Is Collapsing

Hello hello hello!

Fancy seeing you here, dyou come here often?

Now I'm very sorry that I haven't written in a while, it's just a case of I've been occupied but now I aim to rectify that!

You know who I am, and you know why you're here. How have you been? It's been a while and I do have alot to tell you, so here goes!

It has been a very strange year for me, every aim that I had in January has collapsed down into a sea of despair, I left Framed, rejoined them for one gig, was told bluntly I wasn't wanted, so I no longer wish to be associated with them, I'll only keep in touch with Joe because he's a damn good guitar tech, and Kim, because she's awesome.

It has, however, been a big year for Me, Chris and Rob. We started up That Manly Gaming Blog and we've pretty much hit 100 videos, whereas we don't have much of a following, we do have 2,500 views and 23 subscribers, which is alot more than we ever thought we had, next year however we plan to verge out into a sea of original content, stuff like sketches, podcasts, reviews, parodies and much more, we're gonna do it properly to give all of you a brilliant experience when you watch our silly videos, more details to follow, so keep your eyes out for That Manly Variety Show!

A lot of work, time, money and planning is going into this new stuff so I hope I can rely on you, my dear readers to support us in our quest for YouTube fame (and maybe fortune)!

In terms of how I'm doing? I'm a little depressed, I'm also besotted with someone, I'll go into that on my next blog!

This year has, however, been a very philosophical year for me, I've had more time to myself, less worries and more time to discover who I am, and what I actually want to do, and some of the realizations have been shocking to say the least, music will be on the backburner, but again, I'll go into this in my next blog!

For now, however, I need to get ready for work, so I'll leave you with my cover of "Skyfall" from the James Bond movie of the same name (go see it, it is awesome)

Thank you so much for reading
Speak soon
Your Pal
Luke Clarke