Welcome to another of my not-so-fantastic-but-still-reasonably-popular blogs!
Fair bit of good news this time around!
After a bit of a wobble last Sunday after an extreme lack of sleep, I went to the hospital yesterday, and my various specialists seem to think I've finally settled into a medication routine that actually works, which I completely agree with, the last full-on fit I had was back in November, now were edging into April.
With the Citalopram and my various other meds doing what they do, I can 100% say that I haven't felt this good in a great number of years, I'm seeing the world from a different angle, I'm finding myself less bitter, enjoying the little things alot more, I've lost weight, I'm finding more effort within myself to keep myself occupied, my guitar playing is better than ever, I'm certainly making progress and anything past this point, to me, is a bonus.
The risks are still here for me to just have a fit out of the blue, or to just snap at people for being loud or annoying, but on the whole I'm noticing little tweaks that are helping me not only see the world from a newer, fresher perspective, but to actually consider more options in the way I live, I'm actually appreciating all of my feelings, because I feel attached to the world now, it's all there, and I have so much drive and positivity behind me to say, "You know, let's have a proper go", I'm mega excited with where the band is going, I've got some of the best friends in the world, the only thing left for me to face is my own confidence issues.
I tend to have always put on a front to cover up everything that's bugging me, at gigs, rehearsals, everyday at work, but now I feel as if it's time I can face up to it and start to not have to worry, I feel as if I can begin to deal with everything I've been hiding for the last few years, which is what I've been wanting for a long time.
So, what else is going on? Well, I've been giving the new Gears of War 3 map pack a going over, it's pretty good, I've been shuffling some new playlists, just generally taking it easy, no other news so to speak, aside from Joe's truly terrible gig promotion, dubbing fans as "Lukaholics", wait no..."Lukaholix" is how he spelt it.
If that's a new faction he's creating amongst our following, we're all doomed!
For now, that's all, my friends
Look after yourselves
I'll see you right here next time!